Slowly Dissapearing
by skittlesatetherainbow
Summary: After the loss of Drizzle how does Puck, Quinn and Finn survive and who helps them move on? Rachel of course with a little help from Kurt and Britt. In no way do I own Glee or the music presented in this story!
1. Slow Madness

Noah Puckerman reached blindly in the dark, feeling his way towards the bed room door trying to hold back the vile threatening to spill all over the floor. He managed to open the door and dashed towards the bathroom upchucking all over the sink. He reached for his toothbrush and paste starting to wash his teeth. He glanced up and saw his reflection in the mirror over the sink. He looked like crap, pale and tired with dark circles around his hazel eyes. He ran a hand over his now-overgrown hair. He had quit shaving his Mohawk a month ago and his hair now reached the top of his ears.

He had had the nightmare again. It had been plaguing him for a month ever since the day Quinn Fabray had gone into premature labor and Elizabeth "Drizzle" Fabray was born without a chance. He felt his upchuck reflex resurfacing at the thought of his dead little girl who hadn't even had a chance to meet her dysfunctional family. He remembered the day clearly; Finn and Puck had been going at it again. They had been at each others throat since the true paternity of Drizzle had been revealed. They were arguing about something stupid when Quinn had doubled over with pain. There was a pause as everyone turned to stare at Quinn and Rachel Berry who had rushed over to help the pregnant teen. Rachel was yelling out orders to Mr. Shue and a few minutes later Quinn was taken off to the hospital by an ambulance.

Quinn had been in the hospital room for about three hors when Puck and the rest of Glee had gotten the news. Baby Drizzle hadn't even had the chance to take her first breath. Finn had rushed to be with Quinn and the rest of Glee quickly followed. Puck fell to the floor, at that moment the world as he knew it had truly ended. The realization that his daughter had died came crashing down on him. All his hopes to be a good father were washed away and he felt like something had broken inside of him. He had felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up his eyes brimming with tears. Rachel stood in front of him and without saying a word knelt down to wrap her arms around him. He remembered breaking down and clinging to her as if she could take away all fucked-up things that were happening.

Today marked a month from the day Baby Drizzle had died and it had been torture. The pity Finn, Quinn and Puck had been receiving from the McKinley student body had made him sick and being in school was slowly suffocating him so he skipped more often. He rarely made it to football practice and hadn't even stepped into the Glee practice room since that fateful day. The thought of seeing Quinn made him want to tear up because if there was someone even worse off then him it was her. He had been ignoring the Glee members though they often tried to reach out to him. Rachel Berry was constantly trying to talk to him but Puck just didn't have the energy to talk to Berry.

He quickly shook his head as if to rid his thoughts of her and baby Drizzle before opening the bathroom door and making his way towards his bedroom. He glanced at the clock on his desk and groaned. It was two o` clock in the morning and there was no way he would be able to fall asleep.


	2. Slow Agony

Quinn was standing in front of the floor-length mirror attached to the closet door in her bedroom. Will not exactly her bedroom, but Rachel`s guest bedroom which was technically her`s for the time being. She stared at the blonde gazing back at her and ran her hand down her stomach looking for any signs of the baby bump that had been there for the past four months but felt nothing at all.

Quinn couldn't take it, the feeling of loss tugging at her heart strings. As if a big part of her was gone and there was no way to get it back. When she gazed into a mirror she looked for the old Quinn but could only find the remains of grief and guilt. She searched for a semblance of happiness but was surrounded by regret and sadness so deep it penetrated her very soul. The loss of the little girl inside of her had affected her in ways she could have never imagined.

She remembered that day clearly for it was stuck in her memory and no amount of mind-bleach could take it away. She remembered that morning especially, she had been cursing god and the little girl inside of her, blaming them for losing her parents, Finn and the Cheerio`s. The anger inside of her had exploded and at that moment she had wished that her one huge mistake would just go away, that her life would return to normal. The doctor said that the miscarriage had been caused by stress. Quinn had caused the death of her little girl and now she was alone once again and absolutely nothing was the same.

She heard a small knock on the bedroom door and Quinn inwardly sighed. It was probably Rachel on one of her many check-ups, consisting of her asking Quinn if she was okay over and over again while showing her support with hugs and bright smiles. Rachel Berry was a weird one, not only had she opened the doors of her home to Quinn but she genuinely seemed to care about Quinn even after all the crap Quinn had done to her.

"Come in," Quinn said, walking towards the bed as Rachel walked in. She could feel the brunette staring at her and didn't have to turn around to see the worry that would be placed in Rachel` face. Rachel had gazed at her with that look for the past few weeks and every time Quinn gave in and broke down. The girl Quinn had loved to torment had become her confident and dare she say it best –friend.

"Quinn how are you feeling," Rachel started going to sit by Quinn on the bed, "You have been up here for copious amounts of time." Quinn simply shrugged her shoulders and ignored the pointed looks Rachel was throwing her. "Are you reminiscing about Finn…or perhaps Drizzle?" Quinn stiffened at the mention of Finn and Drizzle which didn't escape Rachel.

"Rachel can we please not go into this right now," Quinn said, falling back onto the mattress. Rachel did the same, "I just want to lay here and ignore the world until we have to go back to school on Monday, can we just do that?"

"Sure," Rachel said staring up at the ceiling, "we can do that."


End file.
